Telling Again

We didn't break the news about my pregnancy with Isabella until I was 11 weeks along. This was due to a number of factors, but mainly because I was scared shitless my entire first trimester, and to a lesser degree, for the other two. After over two years of unsuccessful attempts to get pregnant, I was absolutely convinced, until the very moment she was placed in my arms following her birth and declared beautiful and healthy, that something would go wrong. I didn't want to break the hearts of my family members and especially my grandma's by giving them the news too early (whenever that is) and then have to tell them later on that I had lost the baby.

The hubs and I didn't agonize over the right time to tell them this time around. And although I was somewhat nervous about breaking the news this early (and I do realize that to many couples who break the news before the pee stick dries, waiting until 8 weeks isn't early at all), I am much more laidback this time around.

I want to enjoy this pregnancy (which assuming all goes well, will be my last) from beginning to end. I spent way too much precious time of my pregnancy with Isabella convinced I was going to miscarry at any second. My first trimester was especially hard because I wasn't throwing up, I didn't really have food aversions (although I had plenty of cravings) and I didn't even really start showing until I was 18 weeks along (which is why I was able to wait that long to tell my former employer I was pregnant). I had so few signs that everything was fine with the pregnancy that my mind was working overtime convincing myself otherwise.

I'm determined not to repeat those mistakes. I'm not spending every free moment reading pregnancy books or Googling miscarriage rates. I am still nervous and praying every day that things continue to go well, but I am not obsessing.

This time around, my mom and my sister were in on the FET plan well before my transfer. They've known since March 17th that I am pregnant again. We told the rest of the family yesterday at my great aunt's weekly Sunday dinner.

We dressed Isabella in a "Big Sister" shirt.

We walked into my aunt's house, and my grandma grabbed her as she always does. She and my cousin took her into my aunt's back bedroom to take off her coat. The hubs and I stayed in the kitchen with the rest of my family.

It took my grandma about three seconds to come charging back into the kitchen saying, "Does this shirt mean what I think it means?"

We told her yes, indeed it does. Everyone was happy for us. We told the hubs' family on Saturday, and we plan to tell my dad soon too. His dog was recently diagnosed with cancer, and he's really going through a hard time, so it doesn't seem quite right to tell him right now.

And while it does still feel like an enormous responsibility to have so many people's happiness riding on top of my uterus right now, and I will admit to having a very hard time answering questions about plans for the future baby yesterday after telling my family, it also feels pretty damned good to share the joy that I'm feeling right now with the people I love most in the world.

14 Responses to “Telling Again”

  1. # Anonymous Kris

    That's how we broke the news too. =) I'm glad you are able to relax and enjoy things more this time around.  

  2. # Blogger My Wombinations

    oh YAY! I am so glad you shared your news. I was also terrified my whole first pregnancy and much less so this time around. I want more details about the reaction! I am emailing you right now!  

  3. # Blogger Marie

    That is great! I love how you told them!  

  4. # Blogger Pregnantly Plump

    My cousin told her parents about her second child the same way, and I thought it was such a great idea. I think it's great that you're going to try to enjoy this pregnancy more. I waited until almost 12 weeks to tell most of my co-workers, and my new boss pretty much already knew. I kept smelling everything and making comments about it.  

  5. # Blogger Jesser

    Ahhhh wonderful. I am glad you're determined to enjoy your pregnancy. I have the same goal when that day comes, but I just don't know if I can!!  

  6. # Blogger Mom24

    I am so happy for you. We shared our new(es?) way too early to be smart, but it was fun! We were fortunate that everything went well. Maybe it might help to feel not so much like so many people's happiness is riding on your uterus--because they're happy for YOU. Your, your DH and Isabellas(although I'm assuming she really doesn't "get" much of it), are truly the most important people's happiness.

    I think you're attitude is great! You are right to want to enjoy every second of this special, special time.  

  7. # Blogger beagle

    What a cute way to tell!  

  8. # Blogger Debbie

    Grandmas don't miss a beat, do they? :)  

  9. # Blogger l

    I think the thing to remember is that these people's happiness isn't riding on top of your uterus. For people who love you, the joy of being a part of your life and supporting you in that life - that's where the happiness comes from. If you measure happiness in whoops of joy, then I can see why you'd think theirs is dependent on your pregnancy. But I prefer to think that happiness is deeper and longer term than a celebratory moment.

    Yes, I'm lecturing you. No, not really.

    Either way, I'm glad you're doing what you can to live in these moments and enjoy them.  

  10. # Blogger Shannon

    I love the shirt and how you shared the awesome news hehehe...  

  11. # Blogger Damselfly

    What a perfect way to share the news!  

  12. # Blogger Damselfly

    PS Isabella will probably love that story when she's old enough to understand!  

  13. # Blogger sher

    I agree with everyone else! Great way to tell people. And Isabella looks so adorable in that shirt! God, she's growing so fast!  

  14. # Blogger sunShine

    COngratulations! What a great way to break the news!  

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