Luci and Nicholas,

The birth of every baby changes his or her mother's life forever. Babies bestow their mothers with tremendous responsibility, incredible joy, and an all-encompassing love the likes of which most women haven't experienced before.

But the birth of two babies at once? Your birth one year ago today was at once double the joy and double the love, but also double the fear that I was simply not up to the task of giving you everything you needed. There was nothing in this world that could have prepared me for your arrival, and for the happiness you have brought to our family.

Today you are one year old. And somehow, over the past 12 months, you've transformed from impossibly tiny NICU graduates


into still-small but growing-by-the-day, rolling, crawling, babbling little people.


You are twins, born a minute apart at 3:09pm and 3:10pm this afternoon, but you are so very different.

Luci, you are my feisty, fierce, and independant little spitfire. You are definitely more dominant than your brother, more physically aggressive (you enjoy pulling his hair, stealing his toys, and swiping his beloved binky constantly, and then laughing when he cries), and more willing to play on your own or with your big sister. You adore your 81-year-old great, great aunt, Happy Baby Puffs, and any toy that allows you to toss or pound objects. Being kissed ranks right up there among your favorite activities, while trying new foods is probably your least favorite (in this respect, you couldn't be more different than your brother). You love making huge splashes in the bath, slobbery kisses, and rolling a ball back and forth with Isabella. I'm going to assume your teeth are hiding somewhere in your gums, because you're still my toothless wonder, just as your big sister was at 12 months old (and 13 months old, and 14 months old). Frankly, since I'm still nursing you and your brother, this fact doesn't bother me in the least.


Nicholas, you are the very definition of "Mama's Boy." You would like nothing more than for me to carry you around all day long, and you cry so pitifully whenever I set you down. Books and music are your favorites. You love to lie on your back, "reading" a book that is supported by your feet, and you seem to have a rhythm that no one else in the family has, as you shake and bop your head along to any music you hear. You are more passive than your sister, and you let her be the boss. You are outnumbered in a house of dominant females, but you seem to take this fact in stride and not retaliate against your sisters' aggressive behavior. Snuggling has always been important to you, but since you've learned to crawl (just on your belly so far) you seem to want this a bit less. Thankfully, you've decided to use your two teeth for good instead of evil and you've stopped biting me. Thanks, little man.


Overnight, I went from the mother of one to the mother of three. It wasn't an easy transition for me, and frankly, I'm looking for my own cake and ice cream today for surviving the first year of being your mommy. But along with your challenges, you have also taught me some important lessons. I have become less critical of myself, my mothering abilities, and even a tad less tightly wound than I was before you were born. I've realized that there is no "perfect" in mothering multiples, and I'm actually okay with that.

The fall is by far my favorite season, and in our little corner of the world, autumn is beautiful. The leaves change color and the pumpkins are out in abundance. It's apple cider time and apple-picking time. The days are comfortably cool and the nights are even cooler. There are so many opportunities for fun, fall-themed birthdays. Truth be told, I've always wanted an October baby.

One year ago today, my wish was granted. Times two.

Happy birthday, Luci and Nicholas. You've changed my life in innumerable ways, and I can't wait to see where life is taking us next.

12-month stats

Luci

Weight: 15 pounds, 14.5 oz (less than 5th percentile)

Length: 26 1/4 inches (less than 5th percentile)

Head Circumference: 45 1/2 cm (50th percentile)

Nicholas

Weight: 16 pounds, 12 oz (less than 5th percentile)

Length: 27 inches (less than 5th percentile)

Head Circumference: 47 1/2 cm (65th percentile)