Luci and Nicholas at Four Months
12 Comments posted by Kristi on Tuesday, February 17, 2009 at 12:00 AM
The twins turned four months old on Sunday, and are quickly moving beyond the infant stage into the animated, gurgling, and laughing baby stage.
(They were baptized on Sunday, Luci wearing the dress that I wore and that Isabella wore, and Nicholas wearing the outfit the hubs wore when he was baptized. They were baptized during mass, in front of the entire congregation and our 40+ family and friends, and despite the fact that I forgot to put on lipstick, that each took a turn screaming during the ceremony, that Nicholas pooped through his outfit just prior to his baptism, and that Isabella exclaimed, "There's poop!" when pointing to a fuzzy on the kneeler in the bench during a particularly quiet part of the mass, the day went off without a hitch.)
The babies are not on any predictable schedule, and getting them to do anything at the same time (awaken for the day, nap, play, etc.) is next to impossible. This means there is never any downtime in their care. Seriously, is there a Supernanny for twins, because I could certainly use her help. How exactly do parents of multiples ever get their kids in sync? I had Isabella on a schedule when she was 4 months old, and not being even remotely close to having one for Luci and Nicholas Is.Killing.Me.
We have, however, established a bit of a nighttime routine that works most evenings. We settle them down between 6:30 and 7:30 in the pack-n-play in our living room after I nurse and swaddle them. Most nights, they'll sleep until 10 or so, which has enabled us to reclaim our evenings, which we spend staring glassy-eyed at reality tv.
They're still up every 2.5-3 hours during the night. I've stopped nursing them at the same time, unless they're both simultaneously hysterical, which means my night sleep is even less than it was before. I've had some very bad nights lately in which I've gotten only three hours of broken sleep at a time. I'm hopeful this is because they've been sick and that I'll get back to averaging five hours, under which I can function just about normally. Of course, I continue to get the assvice about switching to formula to get them to sleep through the night. I continue to ignore it.
They're still up every 2.5-3 hours during the night. I've stopped nursing them at the same time, unless they're both simultaneously hysterical, which means my night sleep is even less than it was before. I've had some very bad nights lately in which I've gotten only three hours of broken sleep at a time. I'm hopeful this is because they've been sick and that I'll get back to averaging five hours, under which I can function just about normally. Of course, I continue to get the assvice about switching to formula to get them to sleep through the night. I continue to ignore it.
Luci and Nicholas have also switched personalities. Nicholas has long been the fussier of the two, until this past month when he's developed a much more pleasant and calm demeanor. He'll actually sit in his bouncy seat quietly munching on his fist for half an hour without crying. He'll play on the floor mat for 45 minutes at a time. He smiles a lot and laughs a lot too. And Luci, long the more laidback (although I use that term loosely, since both of them are still what I consider colicky) twin, has morphed into the fussy one. She cries A.Lot. She will not sit still for long before screaming. She wants to be held all the time. And girlfriend hardly sleeps during the day. She's had more sleep strikes in the past month than I can count. It's incredibly frustrating, and I can't figure her out. I have lots of questions for their pediatrician at their four-month appointment on Friday.
Nicholas seems to have passed Luci in their development. He's much more mobile on the floor than she is and can roll onto his side. They both grasp toys, but he does so a lot more often. His neck control is stronger as well, and he weighs what seems like a lot more than she does. I know all babies reach their milestones at different stages and I probably wouldn't even notice that she seems behind if their weren't two of them, but this worries me all the same.
That said, they are both growing. They've moved beyond newborn diapers into size 1s, and although some of their newborn-size clothes still fit them, they're wearing mainly 3 month-size clothes now. While they weigh less than a full-term four-month-old (Luci especially), I think they're both the length of full-term four-month old babies.
Things are still very, very difficult in my world. One or both of them is screaming uncontrollably and without reason during dinnertime every single night. I either eat standing up while bouncing a twin in the Bjorn strapped to my chest, or I don't eat at all because I'm nursing whomever is complaining louder, or we all just have to ignore the screams and gobble down our dinner so we can deal with the babies. It's near impossible for me to work during the day now, which is frustrating to say the least. Isabella is two (very, very two) and my patience with all three of them during the day is in short supply. Most days, I'm still searching for the escape hatch from my life.
But I know it won't always be this way. Getting through the early months (the first year?) with twins will no doubt be the hardest thing I will ever do. But at the end of these awful, trying, someone-shoot-me-now days, I will feel like a rock star for having survived it.
(They were baptized on Sunday, Luci wearing the dress that I wore and that Isabella wore, and Nicholas wearing the outfit the hubs wore when he was baptized. They were baptized during mass, in front of the entire congregation and our 40+ family and friends, and despite the fact that I forgot to put on lipstick, that each took a turn screaming during the ceremony, that Nicholas pooped through his outfit just prior to his baptism, and that Isabella exclaimed, "There's poop!" when pointing to a fuzzy on the kneeler in the bench during a particularly quiet part of the mass, the day went off without a hitch.)
You're really doing it tough girl! I applaud your never ending supply of sardonic humor!
In a few months you're going to look back at this time and wonder how you could have thought it was so hard.
I'm sitting here right now, having finally reclaimed a little normalcy in my own life. I'm sitting in a real coffee shop, (with wifi!) enjoying a latte, whilst in the knowledge that both my kids are safely at school. Well Skip is at 'school' and Flipper is at 'playgroup' with 3 other little 'uns his age. It's been a *long* time coming. Now I'm having a hard time trying to keep the guilt at bay. Us chicks really do have it hard. We have to mother, work, and when we get help we feel bad.
All I can say is, try and rope in as many aunts/grannies/moms/MILs/sisters/SILS as you can, to give yourself me time. It really makes all the difference.
Are you guys able to consider a nanny service or an au pair service or something even just one morning a week or so? To give you time to a)sleep b)recover c)work d)insert your choice here?
Look what memories you're gathering--that baptism sounds absolutely wonderful. I think it's amazing that they wore your and your husband's baptismal outfits. Isabella supplied that special memory that will make you smile for years. What a wonderful day.
I'm so sorry that everything else is so hard right now. I can't even imagine, honestly. Four months is a lot of time to be in survival mode. I really hope it gets better soon.
I think you are definitely a rock star.
Would it be possible to put them upstairs in their cribs during dinner, play some music, and block them out? Or, would you still hear them, still worry, etc., and wouldn't be worth it? Just a thought. Do whatever you have to do to reclaim your sanity.
Hopefully, another few weeks and you'll start to see the semblance of a schedule. I can imagine how much that will help.
Yes, you are a rock star!! I know first hand how tough it is - well, maybe second hand, since my daughter did it. Things will change and they will become wonderful most of the time. I know it. Hang in there. The photos are terrific!
Oh but those photo ops are so worth the sleep deprivation!! God, Kristi. They are beautiful babies!
I love that they both got to wear special Christening outfits. Very sweet.
Hang in there. Sending sleepy baby vibes your way...
First, I love that second photo. Nicholas is all, "Look at me. I'm awesome. I know it."
Second, I'd def. be worried if I had twins and one seemed to be lagging in development, but to offer you yet another example from my neverending supply of stories about my twin bro. and me as babies: my mom and her family actually thought something was wrong with my brother because he took a LOT longer to hold his head up, sit up, etc. than I did. Seriously, they thought he might have a muscular and/or development problem.
He didn't, though, and someone--I have no idea who, or even if it's accurate information--told my mother that w/boy-girl twins, the girl usually speeds through all the milestones much faster than the boy.
Again, no idea if that's true, but it sure was for us. Interestingly, to this day my brother is very mellow and laidback, and I'm pretty much like you.
Hang in there. You're totally a rockstar. :)
wow... I feel for ya... I can't even imagine all of that... hugs... I wish I could help lol... but I think you are doing a fab job...
Can you pump and give them a bottle of boob juice at night? I have no idea if that would help or not... but that way you could sleep and hubby could feed one... hehehe...
Sorry things are rough right now. I think you have the right attitude, though. Hopefully the appointment will go well!
I've said it before and I'll say it again... you are a CHAMP. I have no assvice (or advice either) but I will try to keep you in mind when this one shows up and I'm whining too much.
"There's poop" - the understatement of the year. TOO funny. That will be in your memory forever and definitely deserves its own page in both Isabella's and the twins' baby books.
Hang in there. They will continue to change and grow, and hopefully outgrow the colic phase soon - and you will continue to come up with better strategies to handle things as time goes on (like not nursing at the same time).
You are already a rock star.
Might they be teething?
As far as development, remember that they are each their own separate person. I can understand how you might want to compare their growth and development, but, even though they are twins, they are still just siblings. Each of my three kids all developed at different rates.
But my goodness! I am just struck at how absolutely gorgeous they both are!
Congratulations on being a mother of three for four whole months! The twins are beautiful.
I am just in awe of you because I don't know how you do it. Maybe you're not quite sure, either, but you get it done anyway. Mom power. I am impressed you can survive on five hours' sleep, because my limit appears to be six (I learned after Fly was born).
Luci and Nicholas look soooo cute in those pictures. They are smiling and happy. I love the baptism/christening photo and their clothes, pooped through or not. That must have been quite an event.