More Tales from the Talentless

It's time to delve a little deeper into my psyche, which given the baby brain I've been suffering from lately shouldn't take that long at all.

Here are more of your questions from my blogaversary post answered:

Pregnantly Plump inquired about any accents or impersonations that I might do. I am fairly devoid of talent in this area, although I will own up to doing a mean Abby Cadabby (from Sesame Street). Yes, I realize how very sad this is. You need not remind me.

Jess asked what I make for a typical weeknight dinner. Is this a trick question? Because "make" implies from scratch, right? Or at least, not from a takeout place. I am a horrible cook. Once upon a time, I was a kick-ass baker. Now I'm merely mediocre, given the rust gathering on my rolling pin. But I was never, ever able to cook well, probably because of a combination of my picky eating habits and my overly coddled Italian upbringing, whereby I merely need mention that I could do with some eatin' and four plates of macaroni appeared before me instantly.

So, to answer the question already, if it's a Monday or a Tuesday, chances are we're eating leftovers from the weekly Sunday dinner at my great aunt's house. The rest of the week, it's slim pickings. In the summer, we do a lot of grilling, so that means chicken breasts for me and hamburgers for the hubs. We also make pizza quite a bit (I still need to try Stacey's grilled pizza recipe). Oh, and my best friend often brings over smoked chicken and ribs her boyfriend makes, which frankly is the most awesome thing ever. Thanks, Jenny!

Chastity asked if I couldn't live in my current state (New York) where would I move and why.

Unquestionably, I would move to Massachusetts. Not only is Massachusetts a blue state, but it backs up its blue with legalized gay marriage and state-mandated, insurance-paid IVF. Also, the fabulous Sasha (who is about the give birth to her son any day now) lives there, and the state is home to incredible coastal vacation spots like Cape Cod and Martha's Vineyard. What's not to love?

Don Mills Diva asked about my most embarrassing moment. What comes to mind is an event that embarrassed both the hubs and me. Prior to getting married, we had to go through pre-marital counseling with the Catholic priest who married us. A long-time friend of the family, this priest is incredibly compassionate, humble, and about 4 feet tall, which makes me, at 5'2, a giant next to him. He wrote all his notes on our sessions on a big yellow legal pad. During one of our meetings, he asked us individually what bugged us about the other person. The hubs responded that I was impatient (true) and somewhat domineering (also true). His responses to the priest's question lasted about 30 seconds. Mine lasted a bit longer. I rambled through the several (dozen) things that bugged me about the hubs, from the fact that he wasn't handy and therefore couldn't fix anything around the house to his tendency for shaving and then leaving his hair all over the sink. It was a cathartic experience, really (or at least it was for me), and we all had a good laugh over our answers.

Once our sessions were over, we thought we had seen the last of the yellow legal pad.

We were wrong.

As our priest approached the pulpit at the church during our wedding ceremony, we sat in stunned silence on the altar as he slowly slid out a sheaf of yellow paper from beneath his garments. He then proceeded to read our answers to this question to the over 200 friends and family members in attendance as part of his homily, much to their absolute enjoyment and our absolute horror. It was a bit like going to confession, and later listening as your priest uses your confessionals in his weekly stand-up routine.

Damselfly asked about places I would like to visit that I haven't been already, and about places I would like to return to.

It's no secret I love to travel. The name of this blog is Interrupted Wanderlust, after all. I started this blog before I became a mom, so the "interrupted" part doesn't refer to motherhood dampening my travel plans, but instead "real life" (as in money and jobs and familial obligations) cramping my style. I would love to return to London, where I lived and worked for almost six months following my college graduation. I may live across the pond in a podunk town, but the city of London will always have my heart. I've been to Italy (Rome, Venice, Florence, and Pisa) but someday I will visit the incredible Amalfi Coast. I'd also like to visit Sicily, where my grandma's relatives are from. In addition, Austria (specifically Innsbrook) and Switzerland are on my list too. And like most mothers in the world, I'd like to hit a Hawaiian beach for two full weeks with no kids, a stack of books, and a hot waiter to serve me never-ending Pina Coladas while I relax on a lounge chair.

I haven't forgotten about you, Pru and Michelle. Your answers are next!

11 Responses to “More Tales from the Talentless”

  1. # Blogger Simply Mel

    So fun to read this! Helps us all get to know you that much more. thanks for sharing.  

  2. # Blogger Marie

    I don't remember the embarrassing list at your wedding in great detail - I do remember that he shared some strange stuff in the homily! Bizarre.  

  3. # Anonymous Lis Garrett

    Your priest sharing "the list?" Yeah - definitely embarrassing!  

  4. # Blogger Mom24

    I can't imgaine what that priest was thinking. I think you should tell him sometime how you really felt about that. I think that is horrible!

    I hope someday your travel plans do come true.

    The grilled pizza is worth trying, I love it. How fabulous to have the weekly family dinner. I always thought that sounded so cool. Quintescential italian! If our son lived in town, I would love to start this tradition. I guess 5 and a half hours is a little unreasonable to want him to travel for it though. lol.

    Thanks for the peaks into your life.  

  5. # Anonymous Amy

    Wow. That's one of the craziest wedding stories I've ever heard. You must have livid--at least, I sure would be.  

  6. # Blogger Pregnantly Plump

    That's so odd about your priest. I've never heard of anyone doing that before!
    I think Abby Cadabby would be a great voice to do. I attempt the Count, but it's not good.
    I think I do a mean "Fonz," but my husband just laughs.  

  7. # Blogger Jesser

    Woa. That story about the preist is UNREAL!  

  8. # Blogger Sugar and Ice

    Very interesting! I'm learning more about you with every post. The priest thing might have made me you look back on it now and laugh?  

  9. # Anonymous Lisanne

    You have a metal rolling pin? Wow, that's unusual Ours is wooden!

    OMG about the priest wedding story!!! I can't imagine that! Kind of interesting, but yeah, embarrassing! Man ... well, at a wedding that I was in many years ago, the priest mentioned how uptight the bride (my friend) was and how she questioned EVERYTHING during the wedding planning process. I was like, whoa.

    Oh yeah, and MA seems like a great state!  

  10. # Blogger Damselfly

    That wedding list trick seems kind of tactless! Mortifying the bride and groom at their wedding -- come on!

    I hope all your travel dreams come true.  

  11. # Blogger Don Mills Diva

    OMG - I can't believe the priest did that. I'm not sure if it's the best idea to embarass the bride and groom on their wedding day!  

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Quick Snapshot:

  • 34-year-old writer and
    mother to a daughter
    born in August 2006 following
    IVF and girl/boy twins born in October 2008 following FET. Come along as I document the search for my lost intellect. It's a bumpy ride. Consider yourself warned.

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