Say What?

My penchant for four-letter words began early, or so I'm told. When I was about two, I began saying "Shitdamn," a combination of two swear words I had apparently picked up in my house. I find this strange, since I can't remember either my father or my mother swearing as I was growing up, and neither do now either. But "Shitdamn" became a favorite word of mine, until my mom and grandma, through a crafty and persuasive technique, broke me of my trucker-mouth by convincing me that "Sugar" was an even naughtier word to speak. I'd say, "Sugar!" and they would gasp and smile and say, "Kristi! No-no!", which of course made me say it all the more.

At age 5, I started kindergarten and the first of 13 straight years of Catholic school, where the punishment for swearing was either public stoning, drawing and quartering, or the rack. Needless to say, I shelved "Shitdamn" away for home use only.

Once I graduated from my Catholic high school, I went away to a state school for my undergraduate work and left my puritanical and extremely sheltered childhood behind me. I also left my pure-as-the-driven-snow mouth behind too, because once I hit college, I developed several questionable habits, among them a love of Manic Panic, drinking screwdrivers in massive quantities, and swearing. Lots and lots and lots of swearing.

While my hair is its natural and boring brown now and I'm off the sauce for at least the next six months, I still drop the four-letter words liberally. I can't help it. It's part of who I am now.

Coincidentally, swearing is a way of life for the hubs too.

But we also realize it's not the best habit to have when responsible for the development of an increasingly vocal and increasingly parrot-like toddler.

Can you see where this is going?

On Friday Isabella, the hubs, and I were in the car driving on the highway on the way to my brother-in-law's house. The hubs was considering passing a slow-moving car ahead of him. He decided not to and said, "F-it." Except he didn't say "F."

And from the backseat, sitting pretty in her carseat with an Elmo book on her lap and her sippy cup filled with milk in another came a high-pitched and chirpy little, "F-it!". Except she didn't say "F" either.

After the wide-eyed horror followed by the concealed and relatively silent laughter over what had transpired died down, we realized the days of milk and honey were now over. As hilarious as it is to hear a 21-month-old swearing like a drunken sailor, there's also something just not right about it either, which is probably why this video got so much flack.

Giving up caffeine is hard. Really, really hard. Giving up swearing is going to be even harder.

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Now, for something on the completely opposite end of the parenting spectrum: The June edition of Root and Sprout is now live. I have several articles in this month's edition: one on my experiences making homemade baby food for Isabella, another on how to "green" a playroom, and a review of the book Mommy Wars. Check 'em out!

Want to write an article for Root and Sprout? Check out the writers' guidelines here. Everyone who submits an article is eligible to win one of two $25 prizes delivered as either cash in your PayPal account, or a Barnes & Noble or Borders gift card. Each article you submit is an eligible entry.

9 Responses to “Say What?”

  1. # Blogger Jesser

    Uhhh yea... we need to shore up our language habits too (especially in the car - we tend to swear a lot more on the road!!) ... the parrot phase is upon us. Carp! ;)  

  2. # Blogger Tracey

    Oh, so btdt. I remember my son saying "G#d d#mnit!" when he was about 2 or 3. I snorted, then said we can't say that, it's a bad word.

    "Oooohhhh..." he said.

    "Can I just say 'd@mnit' then?"  

  3. # Anonymous Lis Garrett

    I told you about how Bridget recently said, "I'm so f*cking tired," right? We try to watch our mouths, but it doesn't really matter. The one time you slip up is going to be the one time little ears are close enough to hear you. And then they'll say it over, and over, and over!

    I've seen that video before - hilarious. Although, I would never consent to MY child being in it!

    PS - Thanks for the Roo & Sprout mention!  

  4. # Blogger Mom24

    So funny! I remember when my oldest was little, somewhere around 3, he was out front playing--very busily playing. Next thing I know I hear d#mnit, ah d#mnit. I looked up and saw him crouching down uncomfortably, he had just wet his pants! I couldn't help it, I laughed!

    Last night the 7 year old came in and said something along the lines of "what the h___'s going on?" I told him that was absolutely not all right. His answer? Why not? Dad says it. Not anymore...definitely way past time around here to clean up the talk!

    Thanks for the tips about Root and Sprout. I'm really excited they printed my review--that leaves me in excellent company! lol. I'm thinking of an article I want to submit for July.  

  5. # Blogger Chas

    Apparently, when I was two I told my dad that I wanted some "f'in soda". Forget the fact that I was two and asking for soda...I said the "f" word! My mom says that really taught my dad a lesson, as he was the one whom I'd heard using the word.  

  6. # Anonymous Lisanne

    I used to walk around saying, "Damn it!" constantly when I was little. My parents bought me a stuffed animal who they named "Emmitt," hoping that I would start saying that instead. But nope ~ I walked around calling him "Emmitt the Dammit." LOL! :) And LOL @ Tracey's story! That's just hilarious. When Lucas was trying to learn the word "truck," of course it didn't come out that way. And he started shouting, "F&@K" over and over again at a friend's house. :)  

  7. # Blogger My Wombinations

    Too funny. I have a feeling this will be me in a couple months.  

  8. # Blogger In Due Time

    Ah, I can so relate.. while at my grandma's I told A to stop doing something and she turned around and said "Shuddup Bish" Gotta love that sperm donating father of her's. Sigh.  

  9. # Anonymous Laura McIntyre

    I have to laugh, i admit im terrible for it to although the one i say the most is bugger which i guess is not to bad execpt Eilidh has now started calling people "a bugger" .
    Hopefully it was just a once off

    (Oh don't think i have said it but its great on the boy and girl, both at once you must be thrilled)  

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